custody battle

Finding yourself in a custody battle over children with your ex is exhausting both emotionally and mentally. You and your ex are now forced to come up with a solution that both parties can agree on. It’s also crucial to do what’s best for the children and put what you want to the side in certain situations. 

If you’re going through a custody battle, then chances are you have a lot of things on your mind surrounding the situation as a whole. One good way to ensure you get the best outcome possible is to know what to do and what not to do during a custody battle. When you make all the right decisions, your custody issues should be at a minimum. 

Continue reading below for a few custody battle tips you’ll want to know about!

1. The Best Interest of the Child Is Most Important

The first thing to remember when in a custody battle is the child or children come first. It’s easy to become lost in the adult arguments and the scheduling that works best for both parents. What needs to be addressed, however, is what schedule works best for the children involved. 

Some things to take into consideration are as follows:

  • the child’s school
  • the adjustments the child will need to make
  • evidence of child abuse from the other parent

These are just a few things that should be kept in mind when trying to work out a custody arrangement. When in front of a judge, the judge will take into consideration all of the factors affecting the child and make a decision with the child’s best interest in mind. 

2. Schedule a Consultation First

Before you decide to take your ex to court over custody, you should first consult with a professional. If you’ve received word that your ex wants to take you to court, then try to seek out professional advice as soon as possible. Get into contact with a lawyer and speak to them about the case.

Make them aware of all the details, even the smallest ones, and then listen to their advice. A lawyer with background knowledge in family law will know how you should act and what moves to make. They’ll also be able to tell you how likely it is for you to win the battle as well. 

This is all wonderful advice to have before beginning the battle. 

3. Never Make False Allegations 

Although you might want to do anything you can to gain custody of your children, never make false allegations about your ex. Even if you’re simply exaggerating a situation, don’t do it. Be as straightforward and honest with all your answers. 

When you make false allegations about your ex, the truth will come out. When it does, the tables will turn, and it’ll be used against you. Once it’s determined that you’ve made false allegations, your credibility will be damaged. 

Once your credibility’s damaged, it’s nearly impossible to repair it. Stay far away from any dishonesty, and you should have smooth sailing. 

4. Document Everything 

A mother or a father can lose a custody battle due to certain bad decisions. How can a mother lose a custody battle? Neglect and addiction are two ways a parent can lose custody of their children. 

It’s up to you to have everything on record. Keeping documentation of everything will help you in court. It’s one thing to say your ex said or did something. It’s a whole other thing when you have the proof. 

Save text messages and write down anything bit of information that’s helpful. You should also include dates. Not everything happens over text messages, so when something’s said or done not over text, make sure to document it. 

You should also keep track of the expenses you use towards the child. Write down each time you have your child and for how long. If this becomes overwhelming, there are a few different parenting apps that have tools to help you keep track of these things. 

5. Stay Involved in Your Children’s Lives

No matter how difficult the battle gets, stay involved in your children’s lives. The more involved you are in their lives before and during the battle, the better chances you have at getting the outcome you want. Even if you currently don’t see your children, there are ways to stay involved in their lives without having to work out a schedule with the ex.

For example, you can attend your child’s parent-teacher conference night, you can attend all of their after-school activities or sports games, you can take them to their doctor appointments, and so on. This will help strengthen your relationship with your children and will look good in front of the judge as well. 

6. Support Your Children Through It

You have a lot going on, but remember your children are going through a lot too. You and your ex aren’t the only ones affected by the battle. Do your best to support your children in any way possible during the entire battle. 

Let them know you have an open-door policy, and they can come to you to talk whenever they feel it necessary. It might also be a good idea to set up counseling or therapy sessions for your children during these difficult times. 

When Facing a Custody Battle, Use These Tips 

Facing a custody battle is draining in many ways. You want what’s best for your children, and you want a co-parenting schedule that works well for you also. There’s a lot to figure out in situations like these. 

The best thing to do is to follow the tips listed in this guide above and listen to your lawyer’s advice as well. 

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