How to survive as a sex felon
Sun, Apr 27, 2008
There are a few keys to surviving as a convicted sex felon. That is, if you survive long enough to actually get to a conviction - if you survive the arrest, the inevitable media frenzy, your life being destroyed into tiny little pieces all around you, the abandonment of friends and family, and the legal process itself. If you survive ALL that, here’s a few tips.
To keep a roof over your head, and food on your plate, you need parents willing to let you move back into the house long term, possibly forever. Parents who won’t ask any questions, but know the score. Parents who’ll let you be, and who will spring for cigarettes, gasoline, and the occasional twelve pack. Parents who have some health care coverage you can glom onto, to pay for things like psychotherapy, anti-anxiety and anti-depressant prescriptions, and the occasional sprained knee playing flag football. In short, parents who love you.
To keep from killing yourself, you need that regular psychotherapy, those anti-depressants & anti-anxiety drugs, preferably in combination, at a dosage that can be easily doubled from time to time, for the foreseeable future. You need to remember to take them, even if you start feeling good about yourself, because don’t worry, that won’t last long.
It’s also good not to have guns around.
If there are sharp knives around, it’s good to have a clean house that you live in, because feeling guilty about leaving a big mess kinda stops you. It’s good to let those psychological obstacles to suicide loom large - like the knowledge that your nieces will miss you. Let your nieces, nephews, who love you, loom large in your life.
To keep from feeling alone to the point that suicidal tendencies defeat these precautions, you need some friends around. Not the old ones, but new ones, different from the friends you had before. Friends who aren’t on the career path you used to trod…you aren’t on that path anymore, and never will be again. You need friends who smoke, drink, and get high. Friends who won’t judge you, who have easy access to beer, ganja, movie rentals, and the occasional party. And friends who don’t mind you crashing on their couch – repeatedly.
You need to assume that because you have a felony conviction, everyone feels they have a license to lie to you. In a dispute, who dey gonna believe? You also need to assume your honesty will not be repaid with a level of honesty even remotely approaching the level which people now expect from you. It’s not fair, but it’s your new reality.
You need to forget the notion that someone will help you find a meaningful career. You will cling to it for far too long, but no one will be that person, because that person does not exist, and never will. Mostly, it’s not their fault. Mostly. It’s like expecting to find someone who can fly. They don’t exist. That people can’t - and won’t - help you, will anger you. Greatly. But it isn’t fair to expect help from anyone, because no one can, or will, help you but yourself.
And to keep from wondering what could have been, you need to forget your dreams, forget who you were before, forget what you might have become, and ignore any and all advice otherwise. To believe you can just pick up where you left off IS A FANTASY. Your friends will tell you otherwise, but only because they think it’s what you need to hear. And you’ll want to believe them, because it’s what you need to believe. Don’t. Ignore their advice as well-meaning, but ignorant.
This is most important.
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Tags: My Story, sex felons
April 28th, 2008 at 6:13 am
A person doesn’t need to be a convicted felon or a participant in an “alternative” lifestyle, closeted or otherwise, to know that most of the rubes living in Ohio are small-minded dolts. If I didn’t have to earn a living I’d never leave my house.
As I get older I receive more negative feedback about my “demeanor.” I’m not sure whether it’s because I’ve become more willing to let people know what I think, or because people are less forgiving of a surly middle-aged guy than they are of a surly youth. Hmm…
April 28th, 2008 at 11:07 am
Who wants to live if you have to forget your DREAMS?
I know you will just call me ignorant…but everyone makes mistakes..no I’m not trying to be your friend here…because you wouldn’t want me as one anyway.
Snap out of it..you live with your parents, you are an admitted drug user (which btw ganja interferes with psychotropic drug effects) and to me you have made the worst confession of all….
YOU LOST YOUR DREAM.
That is what makes you so angry, that is what motivates you to keep peoples IP address, loss of trust, lost of hope….you are full of destruction and little good will come of you until you get your dream back. I think this blog is therapeutic for you and I am very impressed with its style and obvious expertise you put into it. Also, your writing is very good, I enjoy the style.
YOU NEED YOUR DREAM BACK….but what do I know, I’m just ignorant asshole I’m sure…..
YOU NEED YOUR DREAM BACK….maybe not the SAME form it was before your internet problem surfaced. I think you’d be good at opposition research where no one would give a fuck about your “record.” and where your record would actually benefit you.
I’m a big asshole I know….FIND YOUR DREAM….
You have lost in your ability to BELIEVE.
YOU NEED YOU and reach inside yourself and pick up that “dream” you lost so you can believe in people again. People let you down I know, fuck em’ but some people don’t let you down.
Don’t worry I’m not going to waste any prayers on you…YOUR “WHAT DREAMS MAY COME MOMENT” MAY NEVER ARRIVE.
Get your dream (or some dream) and get your life back, get your admission to the bar association back, get your record expunged, get a pardon from the Democrat belly rubbing Governor at least figure out how to not be the “angry” blogger.
How do you know WHY people lie to you, are you inside their heads???….maybe people aren’t holding your conviction against you, but holding your bitter anger and response to your life’s circumstances against you.
Dude, you are pissed!
I’m sure you are a hoot to party with (Yeah right) You might be a great guy to party with, you might be nice to your family, but reading some of your blogs shows your angry at your self and your anger taints your writing. (ps.living with your parents is a good example to your nieces) Are you mad yet? Do you feel that anger boiling up inside you yet again? GOOD now do something productive with that anger besides sniping everyone in the blog-o-sphere that you don’t agree with.
I have a good friend that narrowly escaped a charge where he would have had to register as sex offender, I didn’t stop being his friend.
If I had the nerve to tell him I tell him this, snap the fuck out of it. The ONLY person you have the right to be mad at is yourself channel that anger into energy into getting your DREAMS and HOPES back and stop being mad at everyone else. (I am just talking about in the blog-o-sphere though, like I stated, I’m sure your are a hoot to party with and a joy to your family)
But what do I know? I’m just an “ignorant asshole.”
GET YOUR DREAM BACK, GET ANY DREAM, GET YOUR HOPE AND YOUR TRUST OF PEOPLE BACK.
ps. get a haircut and stop smoking weed, 3/4’s of ANYONES problem is image, as a campaigner you should know that.
April 28th, 2008 at 11:28 am
LOL!
thanks schmennis. i really appreciate all the kind words.
but do stay tuned. you’ll get it. don’t you worry.
April 28th, 2008 at 12:07 pm
I LOVE reading some of your stuff EVEN though we don’t agree all the time…I’m glad for your response…you do seem like there is a kind, guy under the grrrrr of your blogs.
I think everyone would like to see the kind Tim more.
YOUR writing rocks. I willl stay tuned.
PICK UP YOUR DREAM.
April 28th, 2008 at 9:44 pm
I’ve lived a life that’s full
I’ve traveled each and every highway
Oh but more, much more than this
[Fart]
Excuse me